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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:36 pm 
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the world is a big ball of craziness and i wouldn't want to impose that on anybody especially a person that i'm supposed to love and take care of...

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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 6:36 pm 
plus some kids have horrible relationships with their parents..

i feel like parents are the biggest hypocrites of us all. most of them are unwilling to admit their flaws *like most people* but they aren't willing to change them even if it meant being a better parent

there's no point in being a parent if you aren't willing to change completely in every way that is necessary.

i think most parents are vindictive - they claim they love their kids but when a kid makes mistakes they make them feel like the worst person in the world yet when they make a mistake and you call em out on it- they pull the "i'm an adult" bullshit

you're not automatically right in every decision just because you are a parent. your mistakes shouldn't be minimized just because you brought life into the world.


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Unread postPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 8:11 pm 
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I 100% agree.

I really cannot stand the entitlement complex displayed by parents.


Last edited by LaTormenta on Fri Jul 04, 2014 6:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
Deleted quote, no need to quote the post directly above.


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jul 16, 2014 4:23 pm 
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Reading the replies I was thinking "yeah," "right!" " I never thought of that, but yeah". So all of the above.
The fact is that I have been told, several times, in several different tones of voice, that I do what I want, and don't do what I don't want to do. I don't want and never have wanted kids.
I don't want to do to my kids what my parents did to me. That is, take me out if the universe and make me deal with all this shit. I have an amazing adventurous life (made possible by not having kids, I might add) and I certainly want to make the best of this life since I'm stuck here. But life is a gift? If it was a gift there wouldn't be so many strings attached.
I have to add that looking at the world makes me glad I don't have children. I feel for all the other ones here, I couldn't, and don't want to imagine how worried I would be if I had made one of my own.

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"It is no sign of mental health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society" - Krishnamurti


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Unread postPosted: Wed Jul 16, 2014 8:07 pm 
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Location: Austin, Tx
NoBaby wrote:
Simple answer: I just never wanted them. Same as if you asked me why I never got a tattoo, or why I never splurged on that designer bag. Meh. Don't want it.


Ditto the above.

Simple as that.


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Unread postPosted: Fri Aug 08, 2014 10:23 am 
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Oh, my goodness. There are so many reasons that I have chosen to be CF.

1. I have no maternal instincts. AT ALL. Unless it comes to animals, and specifically cats. I'd sooner raise a cat than a kid.

2. The abundance of neurological problems that run in my mother's side of the family; ADHD, Depression, Dyslexia, and potentially Asperger's. I do NOT want to saddle my kid with that. Two of my cousins have ADHD and what it's done to their family has not been pretty to watch. Neither was dealing with long periods of depression and crippling anxiety for most of my childhood. Also, as someone with depression, anxiety and Asperger's there is no way I could handle the stress of childrearing. I would snap. I really would. I have trouble just making it through an entire day sometimes.

3. The entire reproductive process has got to be the most disgusting thing in nature. Trying to imagine what it would feel like to have a baby growing inside of me makes me want to throw up. Listening to my friend's vivid descriptions of her pregnancy experience also made me want to throw up. I didn't even ask to hear about it! D:

4. It's way too goddamned expensive. As soon as that snotling pops out, I'd be paying for it for god knows how long. And good paying jobs aren't exactly easy to come by these days.

5. Because having children turns you into a boring old person who is perpetually exhausted and never has time to do the fun things you used to do. I have watched two of my friends go down this route. They were intelligent and educated young women with a lot to look forward to....until they got married and then decided "Well I guess we should just start squirting out kids now because that's what we're supposed to do!" I watched one of them just...fade. Really just become a shadow of who she once was. The other one, while she is handling her motherhood with far more intelligence and strength than most, is now so wrapped up in moohood that I don't even want to hang around her anymore because I really don't want to hear about her precious snowflakes.

6. This bizarre insistence that we must have our own biological children. This makes no sense when there are millions of unwanted children around the world who are desperate to be in a good home. I think we need to take care of the children who are already here rather than shove out even more mouths to feed.

7. Overpopulation. We have bred and bred and bred and it's lead to environmental devastation and habitat loss for thousands of species around the world. Somehow we think we are the lords and masters of this planet when really we need to learn how to share this world with the plethora of other amazing creatures that live alongside us. (Sorry, I'm just a huge animal lover.) Animals can't defend themselves against us, and so many end up killed or dumped in shelters that end up euthanizing them anyway.

8. Speaking of overpopulation, our resources are fading FAST. We are already experiencing water shortages thanks to climate change. What happens when 8 billion people don't have access to water? Or food? It's going to get ugly if we don't do something to change our habits.

I apologize for the long winded post, but you have no idea how long I have been bottling this up! And it seems like the majority of people don't realize any of this!


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Unread postPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2014 12:38 pm 
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I've never wanted to have children. Simple as that.

But I can think of a million awesome things about being childfree. But these are just good things that comes out of the decision, but they aren't in any way reasons for not wanting children. For example I'll have lots more free time, but I wouldn't say that 'I don't want to have children because I enjoy my free time so much'.


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Unread postPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2014 12:53 pm 
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I decided when I was 9 that I would not have kids. I remember my Mom hitting me with the handle of a wooden hairbrush...yelling at me:

"Just wait until you have kids!"

me: "Not ever gonna have kids!!"

I was a pretty rowdy kid too, did lots of bad bad stuff, even ended up in rehab for cocaine...I was the reason my parents divorced? According to my Mom. ( I found a letter she wrote to my Dad's Mother saying just that...)

Anyways, I never believed I caused the divorce, my Dad was unfaithful...my Mom was an Alcoholic and kind of a B***.

I still love them both, anyways back on topic:

No mini me

Too selfish I want to live my life and not be responsible for a kid

TOO expensive!! Jesus! It costs something like $200,0000 to raise a kid from birth to age 18!

No Guarantees if the kid will become a productive member of society; I do not want to take that chance and gamble my life away on some deadbeat living with me at age 40 when I am in my Golden Years!!

My Spouse has a pretty bad genetic family background, he is very handsome, but mentally not so great! He came from a big family;

1 sister is bipolar
Father has Agent Orange
Mother was a stripper
Brother 1 died of aids
Brother 2 in prison entire adult life
Brother 3 A drifter

My spouse loves his "me" time. He says he wishes he had kids, but when he is at work and sees how much money his coworkers have to spend on their kids, I think he "gets it".


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Unread postPosted: Tue Aug 12, 2014 1:45 am 
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Quote:
...has Agent Orange


Isn't Agent Orange a particularly nasty herbicide? Does he have a container of it in his shed?

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I don't understand parents. When I see them with their beady eyes and their little smirking mouths, I just think they're from a different f*cking species.


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Unread postPosted: Tue Aug 12, 2014 11:34 am 
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I assume she means he was exposed to it during the Vietnam War where the US army used it extensively to defoliate the jungle and deny the Viet Cong a place to hide. A lot of soldiers who were exposed to it are still suffering the effects today, not to mention untold numbers of people in Vietnam.

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